Coming out
16 year old male
When I was 14 (two years ago) I had a difficult time in my life. I had never really liked girls and thought nothing of it, but when I hit puberty (12) I realised all the other boys liked girls and I kept thinking about boys. I tried to talk myself out of it and stayed in denial and it got worse for me.
I went to a boarding school and the boy I shared a dorm room with (and had been friends with since we were 6) seemed to look better and better to me. I realised I had strong feelings for him but stayed in denial.
All my friends, who were girls, kept trying to figure out whether I was straight. Girls would ask me out repeatedly and I would never say yes because I didn't think of them like that. My friends asked me if I was gay and I would get defensive and yell at them. I got depression because I could not stop thinking about my roommate. I felt that being gay wasn't right and no one would treat me the same. I already got bullied for "being gay" because I was in the choir and drama groups.
My roommate realised I was depressed and recommended the Kids Helpline. I rang up one night when I was 14 and the lovely, warm woman on the other end pushed me out of the closet and convinced me to tell someone. I straight away told my best friend. He was supportive and accepted me.
I told him my feelings as I was moving to the other side of the world and he was speechless. After the move he sent me an email of a video of him telling me he felt the same way. He has never replied to another email of mine again. I have never spoken to him again, but I have got a boyfriend now and my closest friends and family know that I am a homosexual.
